JF Day 16 & 17, Vertigo, Giggles.....

Day 16 :

1 1/2 quart of cucumber, celery, tomato, basil, red bell pepper, kale, lemon, ginger, hemp oil

1 quart of cucumber, celery, carrots, parsley, spinach, lemon, ginger, green powder

1 1/2 quart of alkaline water with green powder

Day 17 : am

1 1/2 quart of cucumber, celery, carrots, spinach, coriander, lemon, ginger, green powder

I had been feeling nauseated for the last couple of days, yesterday I couldn't even finish my juice, then realized it was the E3 live I had been adding in there that my body was rejecting. So I'm going to go back to taking it straight and then drinking lots of water after, that suited me much better.

Major vertigo going on here. It began last night in bed. I closed my eyes and wow - not nice at all !! 

Not much sleep, woke up very early. Another bout of vertigo in bed when I closed my eyes. So strong and intense. I don't like vertigo of this force at all, its painful!!!

This reminds me of when I was pregnant and in bed for 9 months, I don't remember which month it was, the third I think, but I had these same kind of vertigo sessions in bed then, almost everyday.....

Maybe my body is detoxing something from that period, maybe my hormonal imbalance is being healed, who knows?

And then this morning, when I got out of bed, I couldn't even feel my body, it was so light, so light, it was not there, no body, I was only a floating consciousness.....it was so wierd, I got a fit of giggles and had to go sit on the couch for a while, do deep breathing and ground myself.......

Didn't work, me thinks.......

Walking to the kitchen, I walked into the door, couldn't even walk straight, couldn't get the veggies out of the fridge, my hands couldn't reach their target, they went beside it.....

The mind was silent, non-existent......and the body had forgotten "how".......

It was so slow, so slow......took ages.....to make my juice this morning, 

Its like as if my body didn't know anymore how to do the every day gestures, it had no memory at all, it had been wiped clean, I felt like a baby just born, quite stupid and completely clumsy, like I don't know how to do the simplest things and have to learn all over again......

In bed, drinking my juice and writing this, managing very well except for a light buzzz feeling in my head, around my head and a slower speed typing, many mistakes to correct.........

Wondering, just how deeply and to what extent is my body falling apart to come together and heal again? I find it so fascinating.......and I trust my body completely......I feel awe for it and how it is healing every day, more and more......

I know with deep certitude, that the nodule in my thyroid is not going to get cancerous, it is disappearing, that my heart is beating in a more regular beat now and is not going to have a second attack, my muscles and tissues are not going to hurt and ache anymore, no more fibromyalgia, I'm not going to have any more kidney stones or bladder infections, no more unbearable migraines nor rocking in the night crying with ulcer pains.......

And yet, my body is still healing, still needs some time, and I'm perfectly alright with that, waiting does not bother me anymore.....

Ha, did I just say that - oh la la how I've changed - I used to be the kind who said "God, please give me the gift of patience, but DAMMIT, HURRY UP" 

I've done a huge amount of work on myself on all other levels over many years, so there's not much detox happening on the emotional or mental or existential side - but I was disconnected with the body for years so for me, detox is mainly happening on the physical level now, there's so much I have to let go.......

I guess, during this juice feast, each one of us is going through our own detox, our own difficulties, our own pains......in french we say - we all carry our own different casseroles.......

No idea what the rest of the day will bring, I have to go for a colonics session with Julia later - I hope my body will remember the way and I don't land up at her neighbours instead ! lol

Was that funny? Surely not, but I've got a fit of giggles so strong, tears are streaming down my face.......

I'm going nuts! and loving it :-)